MiXeD FeeLiNgs
it was moi best fren's wedding last nite (as in 29th nov)...firstly, i would like to comment that wedding is so tiring..its so scarie im so afraid of getting married cox realli v.v.tiring....keke...or maybe its i dunwana be a bridesmaid animore (ahaha) cox its realli v.tiring...
i was v.hapie e wedding went smoothly last nite...filled w emotions last nite...hapie when e bride is hapie, cried when e bride is crying..keke...cried 1st time cox its like dat kinda feeling where its ur daughter getting married...cried 2nd time during e solemnisation, saw her dad on stage witnessing e marriage...i jux felt so glad n alot of 'feelings'in chinese u call it 'GAN CHU'. cox i cld feel for e bride...like she's been thru so much shit bcox of wanting to grant the dad to be her witnesss....esp w her bro n sis-in-law...im so glad e dad finally got e chance to see her get married esp being the witness...i mean he, indeed has been longing for it...but was almost not being able to attend the wedding. . .
during e wedding nite, i finally got to c stan after so many mths...and esp after that incident and quarrel we had, or rather e angry me screaming moi top at him bcox of his gf (ex oreadi). . . i mean i was realli so angry back then when he jux suddenly msn me, asking me not to call and sms him, asking me to delete e photos which has him inside moi frenster all bcox of dat gf...and mind it...e reason y i was so angry was bcox when i knew abt him having a gf...i was so so hapie for him....but in e end, he jux came to me n sae such tings...i jux feel so angry back then cox even thou we're no longer an item...but still, no matter wat...we've been frens for 14yrs! u noe to me,i treasure moi frens for 14yrs alot! esp those dat im so close to (and that is of cox including him!) hw can he jux treat a fren of 14yrs jux liek dat over a girl for a few mths?!?!?! argh!!!!!!!!
anw e story is they broke up...dunoe y, when i saw him at the wedding dinner...suddenly, i haf lotsa mixed feelings...realli lotsa mixed feelings...its like i felt like going over to dat table cox all moi pri sch mates (my v.gd frens) were all there....but bcox he was there, i oso felt alil awkward to go over ...i v.much wanted to tok to him, but i was also afraid to...n then before i knew it, he's leaving....he lked at me, waved gdbye to me. . our eyes smehw i feel like communicated w e same feelings ( e kinda mixed feelings i haf) ...maybe im jux too sensitive....
tis time round, e feeling is i feel smehw alil different....as in ...previously maybe when i lk back...it cld be bcox i was single, lonely, nobody to care for me...so i jux alwix turn n lean back to stan...but tis time round it's weird...cox i haf a guy i supposingly like mah...n im quite close to him n i wanted to make tings happen between tis guy n i...thou we're still not together yet...but y when i see stan, i will haf such feelings...? y y y ?
smetimes i realli hate moiself being a Gemini...if ure smeone who's into horoscope...u'll understand y ........cox smetimes i jux hate moiself for not even knowing y do i behave in certain manners....esp w guys........... u noe its like smetimes i feel dat i tink i realli like tis guy, but in e end i dun like or not sure if i realli like . . n i dun even noe hw to differentiate between realli liking a guy or not..................i jux hate it....i hate to break pples' hearts which i noe i haf broken quite a few....moi frens alwix scold me, suan me...sae dat im a heartbreaker n call moi bfs another victim etc....i mean i realli hate it...frankly, smetiems i ask moiself ....who wouldnt wan to settle down with smeone he/she realli likes n likes him/her?!
sigh....................................................im so like a gemini....but i still love moi bdae........ekke
i was v.hapie e wedding went smoothly last nite...filled w emotions last nite...hapie when e bride is hapie, cried when e bride is crying..keke...cried 1st time cox its like dat kinda feeling where its ur daughter getting married...cried 2nd time during e solemnisation, saw her dad on stage witnessing e marriage...i jux felt so glad n alot of 'feelings'in chinese u call it 'GAN CHU'. cox i cld feel for e bride...like she's been thru so much shit bcox of wanting to grant the dad to be her witnesss....esp w her bro n sis-in-law...im so glad e dad finally got e chance to see her get married esp being the witness...i mean he, indeed has been longing for it...but was almost not being able to attend the wedding. . .
during e wedding nite, i finally got to c stan after so many mths...and esp after that incident and quarrel we had, or rather e angry me screaming moi top at him bcox of his gf (ex oreadi). . . i mean i was realli so angry back then when he jux suddenly msn me, asking me not to call and sms him, asking me to delete e photos which has him inside moi frenster all bcox of dat gf...and mind it...e reason y i was so angry was bcox when i knew abt him having a gf...i was so so hapie for him....but in e end, he jux came to me n sae such tings...i jux feel so angry back then cox even thou we're no longer an item...but still, no matter wat...we've been frens for 14yrs! u noe to me,i treasure moi frens for 14yrs alot! esp those dat im so close to (and that is of cox including him!) hw can he jux treat a fren of 14yrs jux liek dat over a girl for a few mths?!?!?! argh!!!!!!!!
anw e story is they broke up...dunoe y, when i saw him at the wedding dinner...suddenly, i haf lotsa mixed feelings...realli lotsa mixed feelings...its like i felt like going over to dat table cox all moi pri sch mates (my v.gd frens) were all there....but bcox he was there, i oso felt alil awkward to go over ...i v.much wanted to tok to him, but i was also afraid to...n then before i knew it, he's leaving....he lked at me, waved gdbye to me. . our eyes smehw i feel like communicated w e same feelings ( e kinda mixed feelings i haf) ...maybe im jux too sensitive....
tis time round, e feeling is i feel smehw alil different....as in ...previously maybe when i lk back...it cld be bcox i was single, lonely, nobody to care for me...so i jux alwix turn n lean back to stan...but tis time round it's weird...cox i haf a guy i supposingly like mah...n im quite close to him n i wanted to make tings happen between tis guy n i...thou we're still not together yet...but y when i see stan, i will haf such feelings...? y y y ?
smetimes i realli hate moiself being a Gemini...if ure smeone who's into horoscope...u'll understand y ........cox smetimes i jux hate moiself for not even knowing y do i behave in certain manners....esp w guys........... u noe its like smetimes i feel dat i tink i realli like tis guy, but in e end i dun like or not sure if i realli like . . n i dun even noe hw to differentiate between realli liking a guy or not..................i jux hate it....i hate to break pples' hearts which i noe i haf broken quite a few....moi frens alwix scold me, suan me...sae dat im a heartbreaker n call moi bfs another victim etc....i mean i realli hate it...frankly, smetiems i ask moiself ....who wouldnt wan to settle down with smeone he/she realli likes n likes him/her?!
sigh....................................................im so like a gemini....but i still love moi bdae........ekke
posted by cReAm @ 12:54 AM
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